2025

It's Not Always Luck - It's Stlll Who You Know (or Meet!)

Why does it seem like some people enjoy more prosperity and fortunate circumstances in their life?

While pure chance does play a part in every life, there are definite actions anyone can take to improve their chances of success. There's no hocus-pocus involved, just a few straightforward steps you can take to actively create the greatest number of "chance encounters" with those who may influence your thinking, help with a project, or simply refer you to a crucial resource or individual.

Be welcoming to strangers. We have a tendency to avoid those we don't know, but strangers can be the very best source of new opportunities. Try breaking the ice with someone you don't know when standing in line, in an elevator, seated at a concert, or wherever you encounter someone you don’t know yet and innocent chit-chat isn’t objectionable. Don't know how to chit-chat? Here's how it's done:

Focus on the "C": You're A. The stranger is B. Your initial comment or question to get the conversation started is always about C, meaning you pick a subject that doesn’t involve you or the stranger. It might be the price of a box of cereal, a positive comment about the day, the weather, the color of the shirt someone else is wearing. Try choosing something both of you might have in common, for example, forgetting an umbrella when it's pouring outside, praising an actor's or singer's skills while standing in line for a movie or concert, or commenting about how calm the bride appears at a wedding. Get the idea? Just be yourself and if you receive a friendly response, continue the conversation with whatever the other person wants to talk about.

Quickly smile and say "Hi." This is absolutely the easiest way to approach and completely disarm someone. They're not expecting it, and it opens a huge door that lets conversation flow. But timing is critical. You must smile and get the "hi" out of your mouth in the first few seconds of the encounter or it won't have the impact and result you want. Follow it up with a comment about something (use the A, B, C method), and in twenty seconds you'll be talking like old friends.

Match eye contact. Seminars teaching participants how to interpret body language invariably tell everyone to look directly into a stranger’s eyes when you talk to them. But that can also make them nervous or uncomfortable. The key is to match their eye-to-eye time. If they appear to have trouble looking directly at you, try glancing away now and then and give them an opportunity to evaluate you without pressure.

Listen. Be aware of what's going on around you. People tend to reveal a great deal about themselves during their conversations with others. If you pick up on something interesting, simply approach the person and say, "l couldn't help overhearing that you …” And then take it from there.

Don't be afraid to try something new. This might be a new place to eat, a night class at the local college, or simply going out with a group of friends. The more you put yourself out there, the more opportunities you'll generate.

Volunteer your time and resources. Join a committee or help out at a local charity. You'll meet others with common interests and, because there's usually a group involved, you'll improve your chances of connecting with others who can help.

Remember, communicating with others is a two-way street. Be ready to offer a referral, an opinion, or advice when asked. You may have experience and/or education in an area that someone else wants to know about. So share when you can.

(c) 2025 Jill Reid/TheJill Reid Group

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